User blog:WikiSchm2000/The MarioMario54321 Review Marathon - Part 43

Mario Party 3 Bloopers: The Wrath of Willy (Part 1) (March 1st, 2008) [Runtime: 8:47]

Prelude:

Before we even start this video, let the title sink in. Let the title sink in nice and deep. Unfortunately for all of you, my friends did so and laughed non-stop at what was happening. Therefore the entire reviews of this series will be filled with innuendos that will surely lessen by already non-existent credibility as a reviewer. You’re welcome. Other than that this is a Mario Party 3 thing and I can’t stand to watch Mario Party 3, so we’ll just get this review over with.

See this video first before reading on to get your own properly informed opinion: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8481-wxscVQ&list=PLNPi6H0sXYaCHQG4Br4q5yZJp8uxhid2B&index=43

The Main Video:

We start with probably the most important thing that’s ever going to happen in this video, with that being Yoshi’s typo being fixed. Okay, for some background explanation: if you get one hundred and twenty stars in Super Mario 64, you gain access to the castle roof. Once up there, you can talk to a special guest Yoshi who appears to congratulate you for fully completing Mario 64. Then he gives you one hundred lives despite them being worthless since you already completed the entire game at that point, and then he jumps from the castle to quite possibly end his own life. And, as the video states, there was a typo that needed to be corrected.

After Yoshi decides to end it all for the first time in the MM universe, the creator himself appears to give Mario a letter. He very specifically specifies that it’s not from Bowser, which means that Bowser literally sends the same card to Mario every time he kidnaps the Princess doesn’t he. Those letters are about as useful as a company greeting card at this point. Anyways, since it isn’t from Bowser, Mario actually has to listen to its contents and hears of a horrifying truth: that Luigi has been kidnapped by a tree with purple leaves!

…okay there’s been weirder. But hey, it looks like for once Peach hasn’t been kidnapped! Sucks for Luigi, though. Also, since MM doesn’t have a Gamecube capture recorder yet, we’re stuck with a png of Mario Party 6 footage with a purple tree and a message to read. Honestly it could have been more awkward than this if they used actual gameplay footage, so this was probably the best call MM could make with his software. It does not, however, make up for the fact that this purple tree calls Mario a noob. …yep we’re going to have to be dealing with this for a good few years.

Anyways, Mario decides not to be evil for once and decides to rescue his brother from the clutches of this tree. Ah, yes, finally! Mario is actually going on a heroic adventure! There literally hasn’t been much of that with these videos so far. Not that there’s anything wrong with not having adventures, but at least with this Mario actually has to show himself as the hero that he should be. It’s a refreshing change of story pace compared to the previous stuff and I have to commend MM for at least trying to make a Mario Party 3 video somewhat adventure-filled. At least, until Mario decides to give these woods a name. And the name that he gives it…hoo boy.

You know, I just imagine this name is what Mario wants to name anyone. Except he knows that he can’t get away with it, so he just attached it to the first sap who just so happened to not give his name out. The fact that his brother’s name is “Woody” doesn’t help matters either. So Mario arrives in Woody/Willy Woods with Wario, Waluigi and…wait is that Peach? Oh hi, Peach! You’ve barely been in any of these videos! Glad to see you care about Luigi enough to try and save his life. I’m not so sure why either of the Wario Brothers would care, though. I would have thought Yoshi…oh no wait he jumped just seconds ago, um…I thought Donkey Kong or Daisy might have been better fits. But eh, I’m actually glad it’s them instead. Maybe Wario just wanted to do diabolical things in these woods.

And also, the Millenium Star is here because this is Mario Party 3 and we need the fun to die.

Everyone then rolls a ten because the game is rigged, and then we start with Mario. Their main goal at first is to get to Willy Woods, which I am positive they’re all excited to experience after Woody Woods. And they plan on doing so by all rolling rigged 10 dice rolls and marching over towards that location on the map. Unfortunately, Peach screws up by going on a battle square, nearly triggering the Battle Goomba to enact his plan of getting Mario banned from the party again. However, since that isn’t the title of these Bloopers, the Goomba’s plan is foiled and he has to retreat.

Mario, not wanting that kerfuffle to happen again, decides to break beyond the fourth wall and manually take over Waluigi’s body for a short second to make him not land on the battle square. Apparently swapping player controls onto a CPU is a thing that you can do in Mario Party, and it makes me wonder how players don’t just spam this technique to instantly win any matches they please. And since when can Mario just possess people’s bodies? Did he only just learn this recently, because if he always had this ability then why didn’t he use it on Oiram? Or does it only work in Woody Woods and it’s secretly the technique of the trees? …actually considering their names, yes, that’s probably the case. And I shudder to imagine what they do to anyone whose minds they control…

By the end of the turn we get our obligatory unnecessary minigame, and basically all that happens is that Wario and Peach get wrecked in their airplanes and Waluigi gets to complain about how Mario Party winning rules work. Also, Wario did not get to do diabolical things in the air and I bet he is super sad right now. Enough of that, though, back to the board!

Back on the board, Mario has a plan to get into Willy Woods. Yes, you heard that right, Mario’s about to give orders to the others and is actually strategizing. Truth be told I kind of like Mario being a leader here, but at the same time I feel it’s more because he’s a control freak than him actually being heroic. Ah well, an attempt was made at least.

He wants Peach to get a reverse mushroom, with him hijacking her body in order to get a phone. I’m not sure Peach is particularly pleased about coming here anymore or by being controlled by Mario, because trust me, no one should be controlled by someone like him. Luckily, Waluigi spares her of the plan and decides to step up in her place by getting a reverse Mushroom himself. And he actually succeeds during his turn, which shocks Mario. I guess Waluigi has finally awoken his luck powers.

Also Waluigi says that Willy isn’t the tree’s actual name, which means that Waluigi has been in contact with this thing and knows who he is. And after that, I’m surprised that Mario didn’t immediately suspect that Wario and Waluigi were in on the tree’s plans. It’s the Wario brothers, after all, and Waluigi very conveniently obtaining what Mario needs reeks of bait to me. After Waluigi becomes the new MVP of the board, they play a snowball minigame where Mario wrecks them all by blasting them off a mountain with snowballs.

And then the video ends, with us needing to be continued. And that was the first part of Willy Woods! It’s…well it’s Mario Party 3, I wasn’t expecting much honestly. It’s nice to see Peach here, and the setup was interesting since MM tried to make some sort of adventure out of a Mario Party 3 board. But there’s only so far you can go with Mario Party 3, and again, the minigames were just uninteresting.

The Extra Bonus Stuff:

Evil Mario - 16 lines [16] (Well of course he gets the most)

Yoshi - 0 lines [0] (No the in-game dialogue doesn’t count)

MarySue54321 - 5 lines [5] (He wasn’t even on-screen and he got more lines than most of the others. Sad.)

“Willy” Woods - 1 line [1] (PFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTT)

Diabolical Fat Guy Wario - 1 line [1] (He said his one diabolical line this episode)

Peach - 0 lines [0] (She said nothing, because let’s be honest she’s only here since Luigi isn’t.)

Waluigi - 4 lines [4] (He got the long end of the stick out of the other players)

Millenium Star - 0 lines [0] (Mandatory MP3 appearance)

Tumble - 0 lines [0] (Also a mandatory MP3 appearance)

Battle Goomba - 0 lines [0] (Outdated character)

Woody Woods - 0 lines [0] (Do you think he was made of the same wood as the Woody from Toy Story?)

Biggest Chad: Waluigi - The dude saw Mario’s plan and saw Peach getting the phone and basically landed on a lucky space giving him the exact item that Mario needed. That’s pretty much the ultimate “anything you can do, I can do better” move right there.

Biggest Loser: Peach - She both screwed up Mario’s wishes and got outshined by Waluigi once she did something useful. Ouch.

Favorite Quote: “BTW, I got a name for that guy. Willy!” - Mario. (Okay most of the quotes sucked, this is the closest that I could find as an option. But imagine carrying out your revenge plan and being named Willy in the process, that has to suck.)

We’re not out of Willy Woods just yet! That’ll happen in the next part!